Monday, March 14, 2005
D.A.Z.E.D. i'm in a daze the whole day.. kinda emotionless.. woke up this morning feeling like i juz came out from a coma.. slept till 12 this noon and still feel exhausted.. juz not the usual me..quite affected by my conversation with HIM yest.. nope.. we din quarrel.. just some unhappiness again.. dunno y it happens again.. tho~ everything seems perfectly alright the night b4 or even the whole of last week.. Everything was fine.. never felt more in love.. It was juz another usual day, juz that i couldn't spend time with him cos i'm meeting jiaqi and haiping.. came back early to do some reading cos i've lots of projects to cover.. but i'm not unhappy or anything.. maybe a lil stressed out by sch work? did not drop him much messages the whole day cos i was kinda bz.. but i was looking fwd to toking to him tho i was tired out by e whole day.. it's somehow a form of relaxation as it's a joy toking to someone who means so dearly to u.. tot everything was fine until i hear his voice..
was kinda uneasy over his tone but initially i juz brushed it off tinking tt he's tired frm his work session.. try to act nothing's wrong by rumbling on about my day.. laugh a lil here and there trying to lift his spirits up a bit.. but eventually i noe tt he's feeling quite upset.. over wat i really dunno at first.. and the first tot tt came to my mind was did i do anything wrong again? cos i can be blunt at times i admit.. realise that it's a bit of here and there tt makes him feel a bit sian yest.. maybe it's my actions or my "bo-chap'ness" attitude.. he was kinda worried bout mi the whole day.. ya.. maybe i was too engrossed having fun in the afternoon and neglected him.. too bz at night studying to drop him a few mssgs.. i was feeling sian too after my work.. but i juz brushed it off cos i juz wanna have a nice chat with him and have a gd rest..
sometimes i wonder shld i be touched that he's so concerned about me.. i felt that i couldn't ask for more.. he's there when i need him.. a gd listening ear.. a gd 'asorber' on days i'm feeling down and need someone to vent my unhappiness.. or feel that he worries too much.. know i shouldn't be writing all these in my blog.. but just feel like saying out how i feel but dunno to who.. my mum could sensed tt i'm a lil troubled in the afternoon and asked mi what happen.. din say much juz replied tt i somehow neglected him yest and caused him feeling worried and uneasy.. she mentioned tt i do not noe how to count my blessings to have so many ppl who are concerned bout me..and said that i can be quite cold-blooded at times..well.. so.. it's me again huh?!
this is not the first time it happens.. we can be laughing and happily tog a few moments b4 and next thing we noe.. we r upset over very insig. stuff..perhaps.. we care too much bout how each other feels till every lil unhappiness will snowball into a prob. it's very tiring at times, derimental to emotional and mental health..haha but wat to do..i still like him..alot..
juz feel like doing nth and slp the whole day.. ya~ maybe i tink too much again.. shall rest for a while.. feel much beta after typing out my tots;P
*JiN* slept soundly at 4:24 PM
Saturday, March 12, 2005
hiz.. too lazy to upload a new post..guess no one is visiting this blog anymore..anyway.. have been pretty busy for the past one month.. school work, term tests,upcoming PROJECTS!! and hall stuff..felt quite sad thati haben meet up with my girlfrens and cousin for quite some time..feel a bit drained out also.. it's been a long long time since i sleep by 11p.m. the norm for mi is like 3 plus la.. not good.. uNhEaLtHy lifestyle=(
just finished decorating my hall lobby with lots of bAlLoOnS~~ haha.. blowing those balloons was damn tiring la.. but gd exercise for my fLaBbY ABS.. haha! Tying them and putting 'em up was NICE! *pReTtY*pReTtY* hehe.. bring out the child in mi~~and yeah! 1 project down! tml is NUS open house.. guess i'll be awaken early by the crowd of ppl coming~ yAwNz.. when can i ever have a gd rest..
Went for my hall's DnD on WeD... FuN!!!!! haha.. my table's theme was 'CARTOON CHARACTERS' haha.. wHaT?! a bunch of 20+ yrs old dressing up as cartoons?! i chose ALICE in WONDERLAND:) sweet and demure..oOo.. haha.. but couldn't find a blue frock.. ended up with a pink one instead.. and i look like a cHaMbErMaId la.. haha.. initially.. i was quite apprehensive bout stepping out of my hall let alone dine in SUNTEC ballroom.. haha.. but ohmigod~ my hall ppl is like damn ONZ la.. got ppl dressed 'INCREDIBLES" and 'KUNG FU HUSTLE', 'Mac Family', 'Snow White n 7 dWarfs' etc.. suddenly i felt underdressed.. haha.. but it's very entertaining la.. seeing those ppl's dress style.. oh.. and i went on stage to play games.. and i'm the slowest player..so malu la.. haha.. was laughing the whole night yesterday.. until got cramps.. hmm.. shall upload some pictures for view first.. crap again later.. shall catch some well-deserved slp now~
mE n ShaoPeng
tRyInG to Be a rEtRo MaId;P
SuN wUkOnG n ALice:)
*JiN* slept soundly at 12:13 AM
